“I, __________, in the presence of God and these witnesses, take you, __________, to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until death parts us, and I pledge you my faithfulness.” Love requires law. This statement sounds backwards in our modern society. It sounds odd because we typically associate love with free and spontaneous passion. When you bring “laws” to love, then it would seem restrictive and stifling. Law, rules, and duty seem to be the antithesis of love’s passion. The biblical nature of covenant gives us a picture of how “law” actually makes for deeper, more intimate love. In the Bible, God makes a binding promise to his people (Gen. 17:1-14; Psalm 105:8-11). In spite of their unfaithfulness and failings, he binds himself in a legal and contractual format called a covenant. Most contracts are quid pro quo, this for that. But God’s covenant with his people is different. While there are obligations for his people, God’s love for them is not predicated on their obedience. His love is the foundation. His covenant is proof of that love, and a call for them to respond in obedience. Marriage gives permanence to love by linking love with law. In marriage, you aren’t just saying, “I love you.” You’ve probably done that already. In marriage, you are cementing that love, binding yourselves together by vows. The "law" of the vows is done first and foremost before God. Second, the vows are binding before those gathered to witness your public declaration. Third, they exist as legally binding before the state. Tim Keller writes, “Real love desires permanence . . . So the ‘law’ of vows and promises fits our deepest passions at the present. But it is also something the love of our heart needs in order to have security about the future.” The law ensures safety and security. The binding law of wedding vows offer love a safe and secure place. Bound by this law, I can show my wife my deepest vulnerabilities, insecurities, and scars. And after she has seen the worst of me, I know she won’t leave. Her love has proven itself in vows. The binding “law” of vows makes marriage far more significant than “dating” or “living together.” The “law” of marriage makes love tangible and concrete. Marriage is a binding promise that shows love at a deeper level. Together, love and law make something far more durable, binding, and unconditional.
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Our Regeneration Summit is complete. Here's a quick review with more to come. Video of the four presenters will be up soon.
We're in the midst of a capital campaign at our congregation. Which means that we're talking a lot about money in the church. I'm personally and professionally sensitive to this issue. Personally, because I grew up in a culture where money was a private thing that you managed privately. "Don't ever ask someone how much they make. Don't ask people for money. Don't tell people what to do with their money." Professionally, I'm very mindful of people's perception of the church as a "money-laundering religious scam." Thoughts of Jimmy Swaggert and every other televangelist come to mind.
Last week I heard someone make a comment on money that I've heard before, but forgotten. "Money has godlike qualities." Like security, power, and the ability to change a circumstance. So people seek money in religious ways - yearning, longing, serving, trusting. I don't think that people worship the currency itself, but rather what the currency can do. Which gets me back to the capital campaign. The church's call for resources confronts my idolatrous tendencies with money. I live a rather modest lifestyle, and yet I sense areas where money is flexing it's godlike muscle. "Will we have enough? What could we do if we didn't tithe? Imagine if we had that . . . or this . . . " So is the answer to take a vow of poverty? Denounce money altogether? The task with any idol is to subject it to the one, true God. This is the call of the first commandment, "You will have no other gods before me." Its like God is saying, "Trust me. Look to me and no other." So here comes the capital campaign I'd rather not do. Why? Because it confront me. It reminds me of the task of subduing an idol. I must bring this idol into full submission. I have to beat it into subjection to a greater authority. I must be a responsible manager of it for the sake of the One who gave it to me. I must leash it, control it, and wisely direct it. I don't serve money. I make it serve my Master. |
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