My latest contribution to the Regeneration blog. 

    We live in a culture absolutely obsessed with perception.  Our lust for social media proves this, since much of social media is more about perception, and less about reality.  Is your Facebook profile a complete picture of who you really are?  Or is it how you want to be perceived? 

    Take my homemade Facebook diagnostic: 

• How long do you spend contemplating about what to post? (more than 30 seconds is excessive). 
• Do you ever go through your day thinking of what cool story or picture you can post?  (Someone admitted to me, “I’m always thinking, ‘what will I post next?’”)
• Before posting a picture, do you do multiple takes with your phone so that you can get just the right shot?  Do you spend more than one minute on Instagram, doctoring that shot?  (Don’t worry.  Most people know what you really look like anyway.)
• Do you read about others on your news feed and feel inadequate or boring by comparison?  (We have a natural tendency to inflate truth.) 

    Disclaimer:  Facebook is not inherently evil (but the people who use it are . . . I’m a user since 2007).  Of course, there is a lot of healthy sharing that goes on in social media.  We can appropriately disclose things about ourselves simply for the sake of sharing information. 

     But there is a fine line between healthy self-disclosure and obsession with perception.  Quite simply, obsession with perception is vanity.  We all obsess over how we are perceived.  “Do people like me?”  “Respect me?”  “Admire me?”  Vanity obsessively desires attention and admiration from others through appearance, qualities, abilities, or achievements. 

     I’m not suggesting you abstain from Facebook.  Just consider, “Why am I posting this?”  OK, I’m going to post some pictures of my kids to show everyone how cute they are and how awesome I am. 

_ The following is a guest post from my dad, Paul Cloeter, a fifth generation Lutheran pastor currently serving in central Minnesota. 

A Point of Reference

      Memory loss, when it comes with age, doesn’t often affect the distant past.  That’s why I paid particular attention to a story told to me by my wise and now-sainted grandfather (that would be ‘thirdgen’) not long before he died at 95 years of age.  It was a simple story of an incident in his life – in the year 1907 to be exact – and it was etched in his memory.

      He had been sent out in a winter storm to get some grocery items at a store 2½ miles away.  In the prairie, there are straight roads that intersect at 1 mile intervals.  In the prairie, there are also blinding snowstorms.  Being a typical 13 year old, he tried to “cut the corner” on a mile section, but instead found himself lost in the middle of the field.  He kept walking what he thought was a straight line, but in fact, had walked in a complete circle and came out right back at the road where he started.

      It was then that he learned the lesson I learned for the first time listening to him:  that one leg is stronger than the other and will, without a point of reference, out-stride the weaker leg, sending the traveler in a circle.  He also learned that shortcuts don’t always produce the desired effect!

      A “point of reference” is what I was thinking about while reading a recent USA TODAY article about a large and growing secular subset in our culture whose response to religion – in fact, any spirituality – is described as “So What?”  Call them “apatheists”, folks who have come out of the closet to publicly confess “no spiritual curiosity . . . they simply shrug off God, religion, heaven or the ever-trendy search for meaning and purpose.” 

      I know:  it’s nothing new.  I remember a conversation I had in my first parish with a father who was trying to encourage his daughter and son-in-law in their spiritual walk.  With grave concern in his voice he asked me:  “What do you say to someone who says, ‘I don’t see the need’?”

      There are many ways one can get lost in this life.  Attempting self-serving short cuts to contentment and thinking only in terms of the here and now come to mind.  So can short-sightedness about ‘who I am’ and ‘why am I here’; ‘where am I going’ and ‘who am I going to meet there’.  Without answers to those questions, life becomes a vicious circle, and those who say ‘so what’ ultimately find themselves with no leg to stand on.

      A new year is a good time to sight in a point of reference, get our bearings, and proceed –one step at a time.  Past Christmas and Good Friday to Easter we go; “in green pastures” and “beside quiet waters”; into fiery trials and finally, through “the valley of the shadow of death.” 

      No shortcuts . . . just a Father’s love!  

 

 

      A PROPOSAL:  Christians around the world convene a council to find an alternative date to celebrate Christmas.  We allow December 25th to remain a "Happy Holiday."  And we find a totally new date for Jesus' birthday celebration.  Maybe July. 

     Why?  In reality we have two separate holidays.  One is a sentimental "warm fuzzy," focusing on family and the spirit of giving.  The other is a celebration of the divine Son of God come into the flesh.  So let's divorce them. 

     Dr. Herbert Hoefer, a former missionary in India, commented on this in the December issue of the Lutheran Witness.  He noted that when he returned to the U.S. after 13 years in India he realized, "I'm still in a non-Christian society.  The society may call the holiday 'Christmas,' but it's not.  Rather, it's a pagan winter solstice festival of social renewal.  It's like something virtually every society around the world has at year's end, an occasion to recommit as families and help the needy and feel good about ourselves as a people again."

   Hoefer suggests exchanging gifts on December 6th, St. Nicholas Day.  And then we can get on with Advent and an undivided focus on Christmas as the joy-inducing celebration of the incarnation.  I'm in favor of an all out Christian party on Christmas Day.  Really loud singing.  Lots of candles.  Champagne (or egg nog) as you come out of the sanctuary (not as you come in).  We can open gifts (I like gifts) on another day.  After all, the focus should be on the Birthday Boy . . . I mean the God-man, and Savior of the entire world.  Let's spend a whole day marveling at the fact that God chose to fix our mess by entering it - with skin and bone, eyelashes and eyebrows, toenails and a tongue. 

     By the way, I really like the sentimental, warm and cozy feeling of society's "holidays."  So let's keep Santa, and sing "Rudolph."  But then let's gather around the nativity set and sing "What Child is This?" (my personal favorite Christmas song).  For years, Christians have been trying to "put Christ back in Christmas."  I don't want to put Christ in the "Merry Christmas" that society celebrates.  It's like putting the ugly sister's foot into the glass slipper.  Let's just let the Holidays be the Holidays, and Christmas be Christmas. 

     I am half serious about changing the Christian church's calendar and moving Christmas away from December 25th.  Who would I have to petition?  Pope Benedict?  If you're reading this in Rome, leave a comment below. 

     Those of us in St. Louis are currently wrestling with the death of a 13-month-old boy.  He went missing yesterday, and his body was found, unclothed, in a nearby cemetery.  With the crime scene a couple miles from our home, I watched 3 helicopters as I held my children, including my own 13-month-old.  The mother has been arrested, and a community in shock awaits further details.

     Last week, the Penn State scandal dominated the headlines.  A highly regarded defensive coordinator is alleged to have abused numerous boys over the course of years, even using his own charity for access.  He maintains his innocence, but admits showering with boys and "horsing around." 

     Children are among society's most vulnerable, which is why they can be so easily abused.  Child abuse takes on many forms in our current culture as children are degraded, forgotten, and ignored.  Much could be written on actual child abuse – physical, verbal, and sexual.  But I’d like to focus on some more subtle forms.  And I’m afraid that such forms have become common in our current culture.

      Children are born and then forgotten.  Some adults are so engrossed in their careers or personal hobbies that they abuse their kids by neglect.  I’m not talking gross negligence like withholding food or shelter.  There are laws that punish that kind of abuse.  This kind of neglect does not carry a legal consequence.

     Many parents balk when they realize the sacrifices necessary for children.  They rely on baby sitters, not only to watch their kids, but to raise them.  Nannies, daycare, TV, and video games become “outs.”  They never eat dinner together.  When evening comes there is no help with homework or inquisition about the day.  Only the flicker of television light in every room, as each individual retreats to their own space.  This kind of abuse denies sacrificial love, and ensures that the parents can go on living pre-child lives.  Children become nuisances instead of people.

      Children are born and then idolized.  Many parents have kids and then live out their idolatrous desires through them.  Such parents are too weak or lazy to discipline or they are philosophically opposed to hard boundaries.  Such children are pampered and coddled.  When children are idolized, they are believed to be innocent.  “How could Johnny ever do anything wrong?  I’m sure he didn’t mean to.”  (They should read Psalm 51:5).  In these households the children rule, not the parents (They should read the fourth commandment). 

    Another sign of this particular abuse is parents who find meaning and status in their child’s achievements.  (Remember the dad screaming during the whole game from the bleachers?)  Essentially, they live out their desires through the child.  David Brook’s book On Paradise Drive describes “the professionalization of childhood.”  Tim Keller comments on Brooks’ observations:  “From the earliest years, an alliance of parents and schools creates a pressure cooker of competition, designed to produce students who excel in everything.  Brooks calls this a “massive organic apparatus, a mighty Achievatron.”  The family is no longer a haven in a heartless world . . .  Instead, the family has become the nursery where the craving for success is first cultivated.” 

Children are not born at all.  I’m not referring to abortion.  That’s another article.   I’m referring to the delay if not refusal to have children.  What was once 2.5 children is now less than 2.  One or two children is more manageable, fiscally responsible, and convenient. 

    I want to be very careful here.  I am not advocating irresponsibility when it comes to child-bearing.  And this not an indictment against couples with no children.  There are factors to be considered.   Yet there must be careful reflection when people say, “I don’t want to bring a child into this dangerous world.”  Is fear the determining factor?  “We want to wait until we’re at a good place financially.”  Is money the determining factor?  “We want to spend time doing what we want to do before having kids.”  I am for this, but I have also seen couples married for ten years, and spending inordinate amounts of money on themselves. 

     In a culture of power, success, and individualism, children are often seen as liabilities and annoyances.  When children are abused, especially in subtle ways, our world grows darker. Along with the handicapped, the poor, immigrants, and widows, children are given special attention in Scripture, even though they may not have it in the world.   Jesus picked up a child and declared that the characteristics of children will be found in the kingdom of heaven (Matt. 18:3,4).  Scripture consistently refers to us as children (Jn. 1:12; Eph. 5;1).  The world always overlooks, abandons, and abuses the lowest and weakest.  But Jesus calls them “blessed” and residents of the Kingdom of God (Matt. 5:3). 

     Children cause us to sacrifice.  They demand an excess of patience.   Their cumbersome mobility cause us to slow down.  Their constant need shows us their complete dependence on us.  The frailty of their lives, their tantrums and outbursts, all show us the depth of meaning inherent in the word mercy.    Such things belong to the Kingdom of God.

From a November 7th, 2011 article in Newsweek magazine titled "Don't Let Chaos Get You Down" by Dr. Andrew Weil:
            More and more of us are sedentary, spending most of our time indoors.  We eat industrial food much altered form its natural sources, and there is reason for concern about how our changed eating habits are affecting our brain activity and moods.  We are deluged by an unprecedented overload of information and stimulation in this age of the Internet, email, mobile phones, and multimedia, all of which favor social isolation and certainly affect our emotional and physical health.

    While I can't follow all of Dr. Weil's conclusions, it's a fascinating article.  A century ago, our society transformed from rural and agricultural to urban and industrial.  As one who has family who still farms, I recognize that the number of those who work the land continues to decline.   In short, we are getting further and further from the soil.  My wife, an urban high school science teacher, has students who don't know that potatoes grow underground, or that french fries are made from potatoes.

     I'm not an extremist, hell-bent either on some hippie commune or an Amish return to 19th century lifestyles.  We live in the 21st century.  We are living with centuries of progress under our belt.  Let's acknowledge that, appreciate it, and continue to move forward.

     Maybe the task from a Christian perspective is rather simple:  Ponder with seriousness the nature of the 1st article of the Apostles Creed:  "I believe in God the Father Almighty, Maker of heaven and earth."   There are physical and spiritual consequences to an ignorance of this one sentence. 

     On a physical level, Dr. Weil notes, "a wide range of behavior problems in children who spend less time outdoors.  And now the term 'nature-deficit disorder' is invoked as the root cause of an even wider range of both physical and emotional ailments in people of all ages who are disconnected from nature."  Think of exercise and a healthy dose of fruits and vegetables.  Or vitamin D, necessary for optimum brain health, gained by spending time in the sun. 

     On a spiritual level, a relationship with the Maker of heaven and earth sets us in a proper place within creation.  Knowing the Creator gives us identity and meaning as creatures.  An understanding of the 1st article of the creed gives us a sense of gratitude as well as a deep sense of responsiblity for what God has made.  A 1st article sensability is foundational to our very being as those created by God.  As Luther says, "All this He does out of fatherly, divine goodness and mercy, without any merit or worthiness in me.  For all this it is my duty to thank and praise, serve and obey Him."

So what can you do combat "nature-deficit disorder"?

• Read Genesis 1 and 2. 
• Find time for daily outdoor activity, especially if we have jobs/schooling that keeps us inside. 
• Regular trips to city, state, and national parks. 
• Visit a farm.  Garden.
• Conservation:  If you live in Missouri, we have a premiere Dept. of Conservation.  

     I'm doing a series of posts on some of the perils of modern life in the third millennium.   While there is "nothing new under the sun," 21st century Westerners live a modern life that no previous generation could have imagined.  In fact, some advancements may have seemed impossible only a decade ago.  

     A quick disclaimer:  I am not anti-technology.  I am not anti-progress.  I am not anti-media.  I am not Amish . . . although there was that one time when AT&T came to my door to sell U-Verse.  They asked, "Who is your current cable provider?"  I responded, "We don't have cable.  We're Amish."  He left.

   As a pastor and amateur sociologist, I see our society inundated with a plethora of information, but void of meaning.  To get a sense of the immense mountain of information you consume, consider:

• How many texts do you receive in an average week?  Name the content of one specific text that you received a week ago today.
• What TV shows do you watch on a regular basis?  Describe the plot of a show you watched 3 weeks ago.
• You have likely seen/heard/read hundreds of ads in the last few days.  Name one and what it was selling. 

     I was in a conversation with a good friend of mine who's in the radio business.  He's a true professional, and he's approaching his a media from a new perspective.  He did a promo piece for his company, Rocksonik, called "War on Noise." 
This audio piece reflects a societal fostering of of endless and empty noise.  There are so many noises, images, articles, videos, gossip, billboards, commercials, etc. that you begin to overload. 

    As we continue to catapult with 4G speed into a future of unlimited information, we will have to come to terms with meaning - thoughtful, careful, intelligent meaning.  If all we have is a deluge of information with no meaning, we will be left with a society caught in a cycle of what Eugene Peterson describes as "hurry, worry, and flurry."  The consequences of  "information with no meaning" are serious.  Stephen Ilardi, professor of Psychology at the University of Kansas observes, "The more 'modern' a society's way of life, the higher its rate of depression.  It may seem baffling, but the explanation is simple: the human body was never designed for the modern postindustrial environment." 

    As a people who live in this "modern, postindustrial environment," how shall we live?  Can we be "in," but not "of"?  Can we build acceptable filters for the information we consume?  Can we create times and places in which we stop consuming and start processing information?  How might this inform the church's life together?  Worship?  Community?  Preaching?  OK . . . I'm fading.  Too much time in front of a screen today.  Time to unplug . . .